First Generation Programming Services

Welcome back, first gens!

This week is going to be the start of this month’s theme, boundaries. As first gens, boundaries might be something we are not accustomed to. Our families may not understand or respect them when we try to put them in place, but it’s so important that we do. Overall, boundaries can affect our mental health and our overall well-being.

Many first gens are probably familiar with a lack of privacy and forced family involvement. Whether it was not being allowed to lock your bedroom door or feeling obligated to share every aspect of your life with family members, these norms often blurred the lines of personal space and independence. We might now realize that what we thought was normal was actually a lack of boundaries. As we reflect on this, it’s important to recognize that it’s okay to establish limits with family, even if it means challenging what may have been considered tradition.

Boundaries as a First Gen

Financial boundaries are another significant area where first gens may struggle. In many cultures, supporting family members financially is expected, but this can create stress and strain on personal finances and relationships. It’s so important to think about your situation and decide what you can reasonably contribute without compromising your own stability. If you choose to help financially, consider giving within your means and without the expectation of repayment to avoid resentment.

A lot of first gens might also find themselves stretched thin, trying to meet the demands of work, family, and personal obligations. Learning to say no and setting limits on how you spend your time is extremely important. This ties in with those emotional boundaries that are necessary to protect your mental health. If you find yourself constantly playing the role of mediator or problem-solver in your family, it may be time to establish emotional boundaries to prevent burnout. (This is something I still struggle with!)

Physical boundaries, such as personal space and consent, are also very important. You have the choice to say no to anything that does not make you comfortable. You can set that boundary. Whether it’s choosing not to engage in culturally expected physical greetings or setting rules around visits to your home, these boundaries help maintain your comfort and our independence. Additionally, in our digital age, technological boundaries continue to grow in importance. It’s easy to forget how simple it can be for anyone to access this information. Remember to be mindful of what personal information you share online and who has access to it.

Remember, I am always here to help you through these moments. Don’t be afraid to set boundaries with your family or anyone else on your life. They’re about protecting your peace and your mental health. Though it can be scary and challenging, it’s not about pushing anyone away. It’s about making yourself stronger and more certain of your choices, which can only help to strengthen a bond.

The First Gen Madrina