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Welcome back, First Gens! This month, I welcome trauma therapist and EMDR specialist Stephanie Sorady! In this episode, we have a conversation about what it means to be the “good social worker,” and how that pressure often impacts first-gen women especially.

Stephanie shares how she comes from a multicultural household. This played a big role in shaping her future and how she navigates the world. Additionally, she shares how her mother is an immigrant from Mexico, and her father comes from a mixed background that includes Hungarian and Irish heritage.

As a trauma therapist, writer, and speaker, Stephanie specializes in mental health, boundaries, and relational trauma. She is the founder of Luz Trauma Therapy and supports women with unlearning people pleasing and over functioning patterns.

Stephanie Sorady Arias

In this episode, we talk about experiences that might feel very familiar to many first gens. These experiences may include people pleasing, anxiety, and constantly feeling responsible for everyone else’s emotions. On a personal level, Stephanie shares how growing up as the eldest daughter led her to become a “cultural translator” between her parents. At the same time, she also had the responsibility to assist with caring for much younger siblings. Unfortunately, these experiences made it difficult for her to understand when it was okay to rest, say no, or prioritize herself. Because of these similar experiences, many of us grow up being the mediator or emotional support person within our families. Over time, those roles can turn into expectations that follow us into adulthood and professional spaces.

Because of this “good girl mentality”, we often create this belief that being self-sacrificing is what makes someone worthy or lovable. In social work, that mindset can turn into the “good social worker” mentality.

The “Good” Social Worker

Ultimately, many social workers are taught to prioritize clients, agencies, and systems before themselves. Additionally, we may be conditioned to accept overwork and unpaid labor without advocating for ourselves.

Lastly, we chatted about healing and self-awareness. Stephanie shares how EMDR therapy helped her process the fear and anxiety tied to advocating for herself in professional settings. She explains that healing doesn’t remove discomfort completely. It can help people feel more grounded and confident when setting boundaries. We both want to remind everyone of the importance of community and giving yourself permission to stop carrying everything alone. A good social worker should never require sacrificing your mental health or sense of self. To learn more about Stephanie, visit https://www.luztraumatherapy.com/.

The First Gen Madrina